>be me
>music journalist for almost 4 years
>go to ArcTanGent 2022
>unbelievably hyped
>apply for press pass to ATG
>not even a reply over months
>well aren’t you a bunch of boiled carrots
>but first 8 day vacation in Zurich
>change 2 planes to arrive in Zurich
>physically exhausting yet rewarding time in Zurich
>change another 2 planes omw to Bristol for ATG
>Dublin airport fucking sucks
>really crowded pricy and man the employees are really grumpy but who can blame them
>get on plane to Bristol
>on the seats besides me hear 2 irish lads talking about something
>hear some bands I like in their chatter
>hear them talking about some Frontierer vinyl and that’s when I decide to butt in
>turns out they’re going to ATG
>we buddy up and meet later at the fest
>arrive in Bristol
>wake up early the next day
>take an uber with Am Fost La Munte Si Mi-a Placut’s drummer to the fest
>british countryside really do be like in the movies
>arrive to ATG
>stage tents look like derelict circus tents
>metric fuckton of dust in the smallest tent/stage
>tons of people everywhere
>never seen anything like this before
>hurry to Pijn on main stage
>good stuff but the treble was kinda piercing
>hope it’s not gonna reappear at other gigs
>have a chat with Jon from Kilprez and head to Vasa at Yohkai stage
>super energetic and sexy and sharp
>big shame they only played for half an hour
>running back to mainstage for DVNE
>solid set but kinda muddy
>take a break until Delta Sleep
>punch a beer get some grub stuff my gob ready to go
>Delta Sleep was some sharp fucking sex
>run to Bixler stage for Imperial Triumphant
>ready as all fuck to have my entire body ruined
>they delivered the goods but I could barely hear Ezrin growl in the first half
>fixed in second half but that’s still a fucking travesty
>Ezrin sprayed champagne all over us in the front row at some point
>fucking yes mate
>took another break up to maybeshewill
>fucking tired
>maybeshewill was divine
>cried half of the set because it was so beautiful
>ran into Jon from Five the Hierophant
>had a chat with him and some pals of his
>skipped Cult of Luna because I saw them 3 weeks before and whatever no one cares anyway
>forgot about We Never Learned to Live and when I remembered the set was over
>went back to tent
>slap another beer or two and go to sleep
>the bright yellow fuck in the sky woke me up
>been 15 years since I slept in a tent
>fuck my life
>go to get coffee
>queue is longer than the night
>fuck my life 2 electric boogaloo
>hit the main stage
>brekkie and wake up with Five the Hierophant
>legendary set bronze horns black robes and frankincense and everything
>fucking yes mate
>waddle around until Hippotraktor
>Hippotraktor was bombastic sex but the growls and screams were occasionally too drowned
>fucking sound “engineers”
>mix was also a bit weird but whatever good enough
>next went to Astrosaur and Tuskar with my mates because who even cares about Covet and El Moono
>didn’t care much for them but Astrosaur was better
>caught a glimpse of Odradek before these 2 – interesting
>Slow Crush was dreamy as fuck very romantic and all that jazz
>Oransi Pazuzu was some wild shit but very noisy and shrieking treble
>sound people done fucked up again
>BRUIT’s set was fucked to high heaven and beyond
>spent half of it in soundcheck after soundcheck
>no idea who’s to blame but I have a suspicion
>**cough** sound people **cough**
>played for barely half an hour but easily one of the best sets at the fest
>absolute legends
>Caspian was nice
>sax was kinda muffled
>three people were shooting bubble guns like mad
>works with the aesthetic very nice
>Rivers of Nihil was clutch as fuck but a tad noisy
>amazing performance
>missed Mono because I’m human and tired and hungry and cold
>bolting between Zeal & Ardor, SCALPING, and Paranoid Void
>couldn’t pick one so there’s that
>somehow SCALPING was the better of the 3
>Tesseract headlining the day alongside Palm Reader
>2 songs into the Tesseract set I left to Palm Reader
>more like Meheract
>Palm Reader was the better act
>back to camp
>one more beer
>rudely awoken by the bright yellow fuck again
>it’s everyday bro I swear
>final day
>go get the damn covfefe
>waddle over to main stage for SEIMS
>catch a quick word with Bartholomew during soundcheck
>the absolute madlads put up one hella set
>too bad it was too short
>Sam Sheumack put stickers on his Vox combo so it reads love but mirrored
>caught some of Thumpermonkey before hitting Respire
>Respire time
>holding onto the barricades for dear life
>jumping and banging and flailing my limbs like a wacky waving inflatable tube man
>get out at the end sweating like a hog
>set was beyond clutch
>Ithaca up next on main
>absolute fucking fire
>engage goblin mode
>Heriot next
>fucking wild and brutal
>decide to head to the Hirsch Effekt next
>run into Mitch and Rory from Five The Hierophant
>some banter is had
>Hirsch opens by saying some vaguely intelligible words
>dude says in opening “we’re from bloody Germany” and then an attempt at a joke
>some chuckles arise
>hear some riffs
>decide to leave after 3 songs and catch a breather
>agonize over Sugar Horse vs Frontierer
>go to Sugar Horse after Conjurer
>Conjurer was unhinged brutality
>150% demolished
>Sugar Horse was amazing but they got the shittiest stage
>a real travesty
>take another breather and some food
>arrive at The Armed set
>leave after 5 minutes
>wtf is this noise I wanted mathcore not garbage
>mad stage presence and performance tho
>just sit around taking it easy until This Will Destroy You
>it did not destroy me first of all
>but it was very poetic and soothing
>nearly fell asleep what with being mad exhausted
>caffeine was barely keeping me alive as is
>visit Leprous set shortly after even though I saw them 3 weeks prior
>same set so I skipped halfway through
>besides it was way too packed at the stage
>awwww yiiiiis gonna hear Papa Mikael scream/growl
>Mikael kept insisting to make quasi stand up bits between songs
>motherfucker we paid to hear you sing not your dry northern banter
>it was alright which means it actually wasn’t
>shoulda went to Her Name is Calla and Pupil Slicer instead
>back to tent
>one more fucking night in this fucker
>pack up next day
>spend another day in Bristol
>trip back home involved changing 3 flights and wasting an entire day while at it
>Frankfurt airport can go fuck itself
>finally home
>fell sick for a few days due to exhaustion
>got tickets for ATG 2023 right away
>I am ready

The following two tabs change content below.

Robert Miklos

What can I say? I love slapping keys and listening to squiggly air.